Your child's first dental visit: what to do and what not to say

Bring your child by their first birthday, or within six months of the first tooth appearing. Parents often assume this is too early to be useful. It is the opposite — early visits are valuable precisely because nothing needs doing.

A child who has sat in the chair five times while nothing happened is a child who will sit calmly for a filling at seven. A child whose first visit is an emergency at seven usually is not.

What the first appointment looks like

Very little, deliberately. A ride up and down in the chair. Counting teeth out loud, often with the child holding a mirror. A look at how the teeth are coming through and whether the bite is developing normally. A sticker.

I also spend time with the parent, because at this age nearly all the useful intervention happens at home: brushing technique, fluoride toothpaste amount, and above all how often sugar appears during the day.

The words to avoid

Parents reassure with the best intentions and accidentally do the damage. Sentences like it will not hurt and there is no needle introduce concepts the child had not considered. Young children hear the noun and miss the negation entirely.

Keep it plain and neutral. The dentist is going to count your teeth. That is enough. Let us introduce anything clinical ourselves, in our own words, at the moment it becomes relevant.

• Avoid: pain, hurt, needle, drill, pull out, injection
• Avoid promising there will be no treatment — you may be wrong, and being wrong costs you their trust
• Avoid telling them about your own bad dental experiences, however funny the story
• Do go first yourself if they are watching — a calm parent in the chair is the single best demonstration

If your child is already frightened

This is common, and usually the result of one bad experience elsewhere. Tell us when you book so we can allocate a longer appointment.

We work at whatever pace the child sets. Some children need three visits before they will open their mouth, and that is a perfectly acceptable use of three appointments. Forcing treatment on a frightened child buys you one filling and costs you a lifetime of avoidance.